I thought I’d teach my robot to write all of my songs.

I thought I’d teach my robot to write all my songs,
And I’d send him out into the morning to see what he could see-
Just to roll around the city, and store it all up in his memory.
Then when he got back he could cut up the drum breaks,
Make the loops.

I thought I’d teach my robot to write all my songs,
And I sent off for the book that told me how to re-arrange its circuits.
I bought all the new bits it said I would need,
Then I opened my robot up,
And I got to work.

I thought I’d teach my robot to write all my songs,
And I spent days soldering-
Till the whole house smelt like the Paris metro,
In summertime.
And I was driving on by the thought
Of how I would have the time just to live
When he made all the loops.

And when finally I was finished,
And I switched him back on,
Nothing happened.
He didn’t work at all.
And now I’ve spent months on him,
Hours and hours every day.
And a lot of money too.
And he just lies in pieces in the corner of the room;
Totally useless.